Social Pressures.

I suppose it’s typical, that as a young adult, social pressures would inevitably become a major issue in life. It is after all, the stage where our place in the world is most clearly not defined. That uncertainty of where our lives will lead results us in looking to others for inspiration and guidance. We look to our parents, our peers, the television, and almost everywhere but ourselves. We often do things that don’t make us happy, but we convince ourselves that they do. We see what’s “cool” and not “cool”. This is of course, a worst case scenario. Most of us have a limit as to the impact of society on our lives.

But that line is fast becoming blurred. Most of us have a “me” time/zone, and area where we don’t have to watch what we say, what we do, or how we do it.  Some of us, unfortunately, do not. But one must ask the question, How many of my hobbies, interests and attitudes are formed by my own mind? How much has been drummed into me by society, and how much is my own conscious decision?  

Are my attributes merely the product of genes? Do I choose to do the right thing because I want to? Or because society demands it ? Is there a fundamental aspect that is unique to each individual, one that used to be called a “soul”?  Do we have free will ? What is this festering presence on earth called humanity?

One could simply not care about societal norms, and as tempting as it is to say “FUCK YOU” to society, in large bloodred letters, Very rarely, do people actually avoid engaging with others. One could go live in a mountain cave somewhere, and not be seen or heard from, but then one would be devoid of all the benefits of society.  It finally dawns that, increased contact with society is the result of technological advances. The very same technological advances that I cannot do without. So while i can sit here and rant about how people take facebook too seriously, and that we can no longer truly know who we are, or who everyone else is, and that life is very much like a play, with everyone wearing masks in different scenes.  In the end, i will probably go and become a productive member of society, because I am human. I will end up adopting the same hypocrisies, the same emphasis on the superficial, the same sense of social ineptitude that we are all eager to hide. I will do all that because I cannot comprehend what it is like to live without a computer, running water, or electricity. 

And in a fittingly Bathetic end to this blog post, I will apologise to my imagined audience, that the internet bandwith has been capped, and hence the delay.

Oh, and here’s some pictures. It occurs to me that beyond childhood, we never comprehend "the big picture" That we are just on a planet, and our trivial concerns are just a few of 6 Billion. Most of them are the same as the other 6 billion, just with different dressings. We are not unique. We are the product of cause and effect. Only few of us can change the world. The rest of us have to deal with it. 

Facebook, twitter, and society

Good morning,

For some inane reason, my body clock decided to wake me up at 6 am, probably due to my severely screwed up circadian rhythm. Maybe it's the fact that I organise events on facebook (fb), or that I'm staying at home alone, but I couldn't help but log on, and check my facebook, instead of rolling over and trying to get some more sleep.

Why ?

Perhaps the whole concept behind social media, is not that people care, or that people want to connect, but rather that people are afraid. People are afraid that there aren't others like themselves out there. People are afraid of being alone, or different, and being the only one, who say, has a habit of (to take an example off fb), "counting the hours you have to sleep before you sleep".. Ok, that would be a minor fear. Granted, the majority of fb users aren't quaking in fear/maudlin emotions.. oh wait. Anywho, my point is, if you take away all the social pressure and gossip to be on facebook, at the core of it all, is a human desire to belong. But do we really belong there ?
I know that a similar thing about dehumanisation was said of SMS, and twitter and the internet in general.  To a certain extent, they are true.  However, some forums get along well and community members have no qualms about telling others that they post there, in real life. But an online presence is not the same thing as an actual presence and here's where my theory gets interesting, While excess fb usage is a fear of being alone, an actual social gathering requires effort, and carries the potential for awkward situations. So, fb usage is a combination of fear of being alone, and a fear of being rejected.

But why ?

Fb is society in a microcosm, and an intensification of fears and hopes that dominate our normal lives. Often, people don't know how to react to the immediacy of fb, and twitter, and either play it safe, or go above and beyond the call to "be yourself".. We have manufactured fb personalities, and while we would like to believe that everyone is acting honestly in our everyday environments, we know that to be impossible. We put on a face when we go to work, school, mosque, gym. We want to make ourselves look good. Certainly, these concerns aren't at the forefront of our mind, but they certainly do form a great part of our motivations.. 

But for someone who has just recently moved Cities, I can understand the feeling of non-belonging, but I also accept that there are some groups that you do not want to belong to. Clearly, for me, I would prefer to belong to a group that did not organise, and revolve around facebook. Hell, even texting, I consider to be closer personal contact than tweeting or fb. Fb has it's uses, but is not personal, and only an illusion/chimera?/ (insert fancy term for cure that only works for a short while), for our fear of loneliness.

Unfortunately, we all die alone, and nothing can change that. Having said all that, I still find my fb usage spiked when I moved, until i realised that my friends back in sydney probably had better things to do, and could not possibly respond to every tag that I had. So the only solution for me is to engage with friends I have here, while using fb to keep in occasional touch with people over there. Unfortunately, that's easier said than done, because physical interactivity requires a lot more effort and risk than typing away on a keyboard..